God's grace

God is really good because he never lets me fall too far before picking me up. This was represented in both physical and spiritual sense.

Spiritually, I was growing really slowly last semester, because I was really callouse, and dry. I thought I could do things my way, i thought I grew enough, that i didn't need god to teach me lessons anymore. however, I was wrong. I was apathetic most of the times, and stopped reaching out to people. More over, I was bitter. i was bitter at the fact that I was callouse, apathetic. Even though I was not blaming God verally for such things, my actions show my dissatisfaction to my savior. However, God's love never stops. He picks me up time after time, and shows me his love everytime i am unsure of it. He restrains his wrath from this sinner who was betraying him every single day. I could not possibly do this if I were to be put in his shoes.

Another thing that I was left speechless is that during break, when we were skiing, I went through the woods, but hit a bump and fell. I didn't remeber how I fell, didn't remember the pain, and when i woke up, i was able to remember things correctly even though it did take a while for things to come back into my memory. i threw up in the ambulance, and the nurse told me that I could possibly have a head injury. However, when I went to the hospital, underwent the CAT scan, they found out that i dind't have any injury, my head was fine. Only my brain fell out of place a little-- I got a concussion. Even that, God is very greacious to me. I didn't break a bone, didn't injure any part of my body. And the fact that a lot of people die from falling when skiing, getting a concussion was not a big deal at all.

I am also really thankful for my family, for their taking care of me, and just their heart for me. i am very very touched by my aunt and uncle waking up every 3-4 hours to wake me up, according to the doctor's instruction. they just care so much for me that they didn't care i smelled bad, every time I stand up trying to do something, they always tell me to sit down or lie down to rest my head. they asked me at least once every 2-3 hours how I felt. some of these are little things, and they don't take much effort to do or say. But it's just these little things that warmed my heart. They are the gift that God's put into my life. I am very thankful of them and am very blessed by them!

God is pulling back to him, I will come back, and try my best to follow him.