So I haven't been here for a while, and this summer i couldn't feel God as much as I did my freshman year. I blamed God for not showing hhimself to me, and blamed him for leaving me after giving me two lessons to learn. However I was so blind to see the changes that i had during this 4 months. I was so blind to see his works on me. eventhough i didn't readt he bible much, i didn't pray as much, i wasn't asking him for help as much. yet, he still works in me. he never gave up on me. I just fail to see that for the past 4 months.
also, i was so dependant on the worldly people instead of depend on him. I went back home to china where my parents are and there i found that since they are with me, i started depending on them. thinking that they could bring me what I need. they did materialistically, but not spiritually. God still didn't give up on me when i turned myself away from him. he still loved me as he did before, and gave me a lot of blessings. He showed me my problems and I'm sure he will help me fix them.
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